A nice fresh contentment bubble

That's where I sat last night.
So chipper, a nice change really.

Went to a bar near my apartment to watch the Sox game and all things aligned perfectly.
Allow me to describe the happy array of televisions placed in front of me as I enjoyed cheap beer and cheaper chicken wings.

In front of me: The Red Sox - winning. Trot welcomed back. Youk's inside the park homer. Indians getting injured and called out anyway. Schilling easing my fears.
To my left: Hockey, always nice
To my right: The Yankees - losing - again.
To my far right: Basketball - ok, didn't really care about that one.

Put them all together, along with a few friends entering the bar late in the game and I was downright hip and spanky.

Full of chicken wings, full of beer, amongst friends and just witnessed a fantastic Red Sox game.
A good night.

Tonight? Beckett makes his return, I go to pool league and still get to watch since they have the MLB package there. And, oh yeah, amongst friends again for the night. This is a good trend.

Fun with marketing research

So, some time ago, I completed some online survey asking me if I'd be willing to try a certain frozen food product.
I said sure and expected to receive a coupon allowing me to purchase said item for free.

Little did I know I would receive a large styro mailing package with the item enclosed, encased in some dry ice.

Some poorly wrapped dry ice I might add.
Burned the crap outta my left hand unknowingly picking it up.

But, add the ice to a sink and run some water and, well, pretty spiffy to watch.
The pics don't do it justice, but still, had to share.

Kinda nifty. Especially considering it was 89 degrees yesterday, it served as a nice, foggy, almost cool diversion for a bit.

Geez, Jess, morbid much?

Alright, got that last post out of my system.
I've since slept and feel a little better.

let's move on.

I wish I wish I wish

Allow me to preface this with the all-important disclaimer: Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything stupid. Ok? Ok.

Now then. I wish.

I wish there were a way for me to be done with my life intentionally, without anyone in the aftermath thinking that they had anything to do with it. I mean, really, not to be morbid, but I can honestly say that the only reason I'm allowing myself to stay in existence is because I'm afraid that, regardless of any amount of explaining, someone out there will blame themself and I just don't want that.
It sounds kind of bleak and pathetic to put it that way, but really, honestly, it's true.
Bottom line, when I make my lists (almost daily I do this, I might add, just to stave it off) I come up with lists. Too numerous to list are my reasons to end it all and, in the end, my reason(s) not to is simple: (x) might blame themself. That reason alone is enough not to. We've all felt remorse for any number of things, but the last thing I want is for someone to feel remorse for something they have no business feeling remorse for. Unfortunately, were I absent, I wouldn't be able to convince said person that they weren't responsible.
Fuckin' chicken and the egg.
Stupid semantics.

It comes down to simple math. I don't know how many of you read my manditory reading a few months back, but it still, to this date, sums up my thoughts about an modicum of an afterlife, being an atheist and all.

In the end, I consider myself maintained by the memory(ies) of others. At this point, I don't want to be remembered by thoughts of regret or annoyance (as in, "who does she think she is, bailing like that?!").
In the end, I'll always linger, not to mooch on the disability payments provided by society, not to subsist on the sympathy of others. No. If nothing else, to confound those who didn't know I had issues and only found out after the fact that I dealt with shit better than they when they had nothing to deal with. No, that's not true either, that's just petty.
I honestly don't really know why. Really I don't.

I just know I will, so don't fret, should you have been disposed to otherwise. Fear not.
For the rest of you, so sorry to disappoint, I'll be around. And not just to root for the Sox.

The Dice-man cometh

I'll make this brief, since it's 85 degrees right now and I desperately need to get back in front of a fan.

Huge sigh of relief today as Daisuke Matsusaka finally pitched a complete game.
Granted, more than 120 pitches, but still, one run against the second best record in the AL Detroit Tigers. A good night. Definitely.

That's all.
Back on hiatus I go!

One of these days I'll post some pics from my architecture boat tour from my parental visit last weekend. I was still pretty ill at the time so I need to process a little more before I post.

Ok, buh bye.

The parents are coming! The parents are coming!

This will be the second time that my parents have visited me in the city I was living in since moving out of their home after high school.

The first time was in St. Paul, MN for my college graduation.
Now, eleven years later, they are descending upon Chicago for the weekend.

Kinda apprehensive to tell the truth, not sure how I'll entertain them thru Monday, but it should work out.
There is the architectural boat tour that I scheduled for Sunday.
Also, and I'm kinda proud of myself, I managed to score us some reservations for dinner tomorrow night at Charlie Trotter's, a place that recommends 10-12(!!!!) advance reservation for a weekend dining experience. Guess I just got really lucky. I called them last week just as they were completing their confirmation/cancellation for this upcoming weekend.

Beyond that, well, there are certainly a ton of museums to go to, so we'll be busy.
Just hope they'll bear with me. Spent the week in bed with the flu so I may not quite have the gusto they may be hoping for.

Still, it'll be a refreshing change to see them on my turf for a change.
Until then, back to the Red Sox game.

Not even going to comment on this past week's plus worth of games. All too exciting, startling, frightening and as always entertaining to recap.

We'll see how much longer this hiatus lasts.
I'll be back. Eventually.